Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
He told me they were just razor bumps!
Woke up with a chicken parm sandwich in my clutch. Aaaand I'm eating it.
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
I got kicked out of the men's bathroom at the diner last night because i was straddling the sink attempting to pee with pants on. Beat that.
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
She told me to take deeps breaths and I said I said YOU FUCKING TAKE A BREATH CAROL IM SURE IF YOU WERE IN MY POSITION YOU WOULD HAVE OFFED YOURSELF ALREADY and she said my name is Becky 😂
Randomize