He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
do herpes really smell.
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
why is my clorox wipe dispenser full of tortillas?
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
I have just disproved the common belief that it is impossible to have mediocre sex in a fire truck.
The fire in my vagina flames on. Fucking terrible firefighter
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
Change the sheets & put your dick in the dishwasher. I'll see you in an hour.
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
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