Words i added to my t9 today: gnomes, facebook, and chlamydia.
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
I wanna be like, dude, I peed your bed. Like you laid in my pee. And we're not dating. You can find another fuck buddy who I'm sure won't piss on you.
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
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