This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
My life is like the prequel to "40 Year Old Virgin"
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
My mom just invited me to come with them on their honeymoon to Mexico this summer. And I got a Bump-It in my stocking.
Pass the awkward sauce please.
I'm drowning in it here
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
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