i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
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