She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!!
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
I'm literally in my bed still trying to find the energy to take my corset off so I can binge eat oreos
Randomize
