I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
Every fourth of July I get sentimental when I think back to the one where we drove around baked off our asses crashing multiple cookouts listening to Team America's "America, Fuck Yea" on repeat. I miss us.
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
For my birthday I want you to get me in bed with Donald Trump. That is all. You have 3 months
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
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