I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
I woke up in a warehouse with the words “Property of Adam” written on my chest in frosting.
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