I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
and next time when you feel me up, do it right
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
you went into starbucks asked for a mocha "on the rocks"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
Friends bring friends secret work margaritas. my pink water bottle is in the cupboard
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Um ... did I have a lizard on my shoulder last night at the bar?
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
Saw my doctor at the bar. He bought me a drink. I think he was looking up my medical record on his phone because he suddenly had to go. syphilis continues to fuck with my life
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
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