TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
She called me her guardian angel after I picked her phone up from the river of pee coming from her front porch.
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
3 words: harry potter burlesque. My life is so much more awesome than yours right now.
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
Randomize
