Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
I called him Han Solo during sex, he looked at me like he was mortified then I realized he came.
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
Mehhh. I just tried to type 'extremely', and it auto corrected to 'creek rot'. IT KNOWS WHAT I LOOK LIKE
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
Randomize
