Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
WHY DID YOU INVITE ALEX?!?
Because she offered to bring a keg.
And also because you fucked her in an alley last week and I'm trying to be a good friend.
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
Randomize
