I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours
Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
I told my manager I was trying to conserve my energy for date night/Sexual Olympics later. That's legit for another break, right?
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
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