My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
the maid of honor just got in a fight with the mother of the bride at a gas station across the street. best. wedding. ever.
Oh god. It's my first day here, I'm still drunk and somebody just drifted in a forklift. I'm going to die.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
I wish the sun would stop judging me for being drunk while it's still shining.
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
I just found out that my husband and I are Eskimo siblings. What in the actual fuck?!
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
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