I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
the most terrified I've ever been was seeing Danny Devito squirming on the ground in this underwear, covered in hand sanitizer, completely hairless
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
Fuck you. Fuck this party. I just wanted to be pretty with a cute little tiara and boys sucking my tits, now i have a hangman game drawn on my face and jello shots in my hair.
I wanted to give you a great birthday party. You know I did.
Oh man I missed being single! Two different guys just sent me dick pics during my kid’s little league game.
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