I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
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