can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
my taxi driver is listening to 50 shades of grey audiobook. this is uncomfortable.
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
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