I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
She legitimately thought I was hiding in the fridge, then she checked the second one to be sure
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
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