I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
Okay, so when I go to meet your grandma, let's do a quick cum check to we don't have another "what's that on your face?" situation.
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
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