and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
I'm seriously gonna die surrounded by a million cats and an unbroken hymen
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
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