He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
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