yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
we woke up to him feeding us cheetos at 3am. and by feeding i mean shoving them in our mouths and saying "i mean who doesn't like cheetos"
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency
We were drunk having sex and I knocked over her bedside table/fish bowl and she jumped off to check if her fish was still alive but she made me pasta so it's cool
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
Randomize
