What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
She told me to "stuff her hole like a build-a-bear". I was so drunk I didn't even think that was weird.
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
Missing both credit cards and just had a flashback of grinding my nuts on the terrified cab driver for amusement. i am feeling a slight hate for myself right now.
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
Randomize
