Who knew that being in a committed relationship is the same thing as forced celibacy? Did not sign up for this.
ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
do nipples grow back?
Randomize
