Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
walking on campus just saw the exact moment some kids life got ruined
he's on the phone and just starts going "FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCKKKKK", then follows it with "Are you sure your pregnant?"... made my day
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
So bottomless mimosas = me waking up in a truck bed in a random neighborhood with no purse or phone or idea how I got there.
Randomize
