so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
Apple trackpads and semen don't mix. On the way to the Apple Store.
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
I made an executive decision to rename my Resume file to something other than MONEYMONEYMONEY.
My penis definitely considers my Captain Cock costume a success
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
Randomize
