I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
I literally just skipped to the fridge when I realized we had enough vodka left to get day drunk
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
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