So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
Randomize
