I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
Left for charity run at 5AM. Saw a pigeon eating last night's vomit and a pair of shame-walkers in high heels. Nature at it's finest.
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
The kid I'm babysitting just asked if I had a boyfriend. WHY IS A FOUR YEAR OLD MAKING ME FEEL BAD ABOUT MY LIFE
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
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