All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
Can you explain to me later why there's a pirate hat in my bathtub
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
Randomize
