my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
Just drunk tweeted NASA asking them to give me a lift home in one of their spaceships. Fingers crossed
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
Randomize
