He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sean getting laid is an anomaly, Sean banging the hottest single girl at the wedding is a fucking unicorn being ridden by a leprechaun walking through mordor.
Today is going to be the longest game of "was that a fart, or do I need to go wipe?" I have ever played. Maybe the most challenging too.
Based on the fact my iPad is covered in pizza, I'm going to assume I ate pizza last night
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In other news, I just sneezed and almost shit myself. What is happening to my life??
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
Randomize