Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
luckily my workout playlist doubles as a masturbation playlist.
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
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