They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
Randomize
