So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
Do you remember when I jumped into your arms and you farted?
You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
How did you get a free t-shirt at the strip club?
I was attacked by whores
You threw up on yourself again didn't you?
They were strong whores
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
He said he wanted to make me his Twinkie, "filled with his delicious cream." ABSOLUTELY 100% NO YOU MAY NOT REPEAT ****NOT**** GIVE HIM MY NUMBER EVER EVER EVER. Please confirm receipt and full comprehension of this message.
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
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