I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
Every time we have sex I can't stop thinking about Jesus
my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
i called him pencil dick in front of over half of his fraternity brothers...
...never gotten so many high fives in my life! fuck ya i win!
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
Hey, next time you have sex, flick his balls, and tell him "thats for getting spit in jennifer's eye and laughing about it."
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
I can't break up with him, I ran the math. Taking into account his 7 inch penis and the standard deviation from average, almost 90% of guys should have a smaller penis than he does.
Really? Penis math? This is why guys shouldn't date female engineers.
the night ended with taco bell and tears
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
Randomize
