It's more exciting when they aren't single....and even better when you have to pretend that you just slept with their roommate while trying to do the walk a shame as their girlfriend comes marching into the apt.
Im not the least bit jealous of the life you lead.
When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
so what if he's got a new girlfriend. the guy i'm fucking has an english accent. i win.
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize
