Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(610): View more from Pennsylvania

can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans

(1-610): View more from Pennsylvania

who is canola oil?

(610): View more from Pennsylvania

you're an idiot.

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(610): can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans (1-610): who is canola oil? (610): you're an idiot. http://tfl.nu/vy3c

Replies (64) Good night (2957) Bad night (730)
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(415): View more from California

I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?

(512): View more from Texas

Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.

(415): View more from California

Watch for tornadoes.

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(415): I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana? (512): Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought. (415): Watch for tornadoes. http://tfl.nu/7qwf

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(219): View more from Indiana

I thought Christmas was going to come before I did

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(219): I thought Christmas was going to come before I did http://tfl.nu/cili

Replies (10) Good night (952) Bad night (6879) Order T-Shirt
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(301): View more from Maryland

guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye

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(301): guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye http://tfl.nu/qvf8

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(703): View more from Virginia

just balanced a champagne glass on my gut. thanks to beer im a living breathing tempur-pedic mattress.

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(703): just balanced a champagne glass on my gut. thanks to beer im a living breathing tempur-pedic mattress. http://tfl.nu/rj37

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(301): View more from Maryland

and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit

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(301): and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit http://tfl.nu/fjd7

Replies (8) Good night (4350) Bad night (804) Order T-Shirt
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(850): View more from Florida

HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.

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(850): HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF. http://tfl.nu/8qce

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(303): View more from Colorado

There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat

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(303): There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat http://tfl.nu/blab

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(+61): View more from Australia

she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.

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(+61): she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth. http://tfl.nu/joaz

Replies (3) Good night (1174) Bad night (616)
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(414): View more from Wisconsin

No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.

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(414): No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student. http://tfl.nu/q9kq

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(949): View more from California

Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.

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(949): Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you. http://tfl.nu/q3ie

Replies (29) Good night (4999) Bad night (790)
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(765): View more from Indiana

Pretending to leave a voicemail when the person answers the phone....that's gotta be drunk dial level 99

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(765): Pretending to leave a voicemail when the person answers the phone....that's gotta be drunk dial level 99 http://tfl.nu/kc7o

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(254): View more from Texas

Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.

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(254): Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst. http://tfl.nu/n2od

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(610): View more from Pennsylvania

You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.

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(610): You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me. http://tfl.nu/fg9o

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(417): View more from Missouri

nothin like your phone freezing up and sending out old booty calls at 11am on a sunday. fml.

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(417): nothin like your phone freezing up and sending out old booty calls at 11am on a sunday. fml. http://tfl.nu/44ox

Replies (2) Good night (823) Bad night (486) Order T-Shirt

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