So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
Randomize
