Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
Who shows up to work two weeks ago still drunk and freshly high on blow and gets a promotion and a raise? This girl. Good at business. Super good at being fucked up.
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
I'm always down for nudity.
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
Randomize
