Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
Fuck morning classes. Fuck early work. Fuck anything in the morning that doesn't involve sleeping, sex or bacon.
Woke up with a migrane, threw up blood, then my headache went away. I'm going to convince myself that it was just a bad batch of blood so I can drink again tonight
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
The 3 year old I'm babysitting is the first guy to tell me he loves me sober in like 2 years
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
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