then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
woke up with a used condom shoved in my ear. i officially hate alcohol.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
But theres a keg here and me gusta
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i officially have over $300 in my bank account. that's a year's worth of chipotle.
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
If you die first, I'm going to sleep with a pallbearer at your funeral.
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
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