Texts From Last Night

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  (203): View more from Connecticut

  wake up i wanna do it froggy style

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  (203): wake up i wanna do it froggy style http://tfl.nu/zmqx
  Replies (18) Good night (2946) Bad night (511) Order T-Shirt
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  (918): View more from Oklahoma

  i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better

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  (918): i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better http://tfl.nu/xhei
  Replies (9) Good night (2687) Bad night (481) Order T-Shirt
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  (618): View more from Illinois

  I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.

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  (618): I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided. http://tfl.nu/ph4u
  Replies (20) Good night (964) Bad night (4260) Order T-Shirt
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  (216): View more from Ohio

  It's a pity Stephen Hawking can't do sarcasm.

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  (216): It's a pity Stephen Hawking can't do sarcasm. http://tfl.nu/14tt
  Replies (23) Good night (3223) Bad night (598) Order T-Shirt
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  (817): View more from Texas

  Ever since I got married, I've become the MacGuyver of masturbation

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  (817): Ever since I got married, I've become the MacGuyver of masturbation http://tfl.nu/c4tn
  Replies (37) Good night (1245) Bad night (4289) Order T-Shirt
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  (507): View more from Minnesota

  Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."

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  (507): Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk." http://tfl.nu/biax
  Replies (15) Good night (4894) Bad night (433) Order T-Shirt
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  (908): View more from New Jersey

  Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.

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  (908): Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at. http://tfl.nu/8pgv
  Replies (8) Good night (785) Bad night (4179) Order T-Shirt
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  (330): View more from Ohio

  theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.

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  (330): theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles. http://tfl.nu/gk69
  Replies (29) Good night (6700) Bad night (963) Order T-Shirt
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  (906): View more from Michigan

  He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...

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  (906): He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me... http://tfl.nu/pc0c
  Replies (21) Good night (1950) Bad night (3525) Order T-Shirt
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  (701): View more from North Dakota

  Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.

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  (701): Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy. http://tfl.nu/k5h7
  Replies (6) Good night (1143) Bad night (741) Order T-Shirt
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  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?

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  (202): How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers? http://tfl.nu/rzz2
  Replies (7) Good night (1318) Bad night (418) Order T-Shirt
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  (217): View more from Illinois

  His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"

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  (217): His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances" http://tfl.nu/5wgw
  Replies (11) Good night (1379) Bad night (599) Order T-Shirt
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  (763): View more from Minnesota

  My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...

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  (763): My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home... http://tfl.nu/n3b5
  Replies (3) Good night (1482) Bad night (371) Order T-Shirt
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  (916): View more from California

  I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.

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  (916): I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing. http://tfl.nu/ei5o
  Replies (2) Good night (1061) Bad night (307) Order T-Shirt
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  (850): View more from Florida

  You called me to pick you up from the bar at 9:00. When we drove over the speed bumps you put your hands in the air and pretended you were on a roller coaster.

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  (850): You called me to pick you up from the bar at 9:00. When we drove over the speed bumps you put your hands in the air and pretended you were on a roller coaster. http://tfl.nu/k8oo
  Replies (2) Good night (1161) Bad night (197)

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