I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
In my next life I better get to be a bird. Fuck flying. I'm gonna shit on your car. Every. Day.
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
Randomize
