im having a threesome with these popsicles
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
He just sent me a dick pic with his iPod held up next to it and the words "in relation to iPod." Geekiest booty call ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
This guy at the party just introduced himself to me as "the guy who sat behind you on a plane last year"
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This would be a good time to bring up the fact that my spider-man fork is MIA
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
Randomize