On valentines day I took a girl on a date that I suspect was homeless
his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
Dude, I danced with Abe Lincoln! How could last night have been any better???
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