I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
once I found out that a naked stripper wasn't gonna pop out of the cake I kind of just lost interest in the party
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
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