Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
shhh. i hid the ranch dip behind the rooster. don't tell anyone that way you can find it in the morning and it won't be all eaten.
wrong number but thanks
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
Current dream situation- Gordon Ramsey is my Uber driver and he's hauling around a backseat filled with chocolate covered açai berries. I'm good for eternity.
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