I hate all girls vehemently.
I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
Divorce is final. Doing tequila shots at 1 in the afternoon.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
You left me a voice message at 5 a.m. It was mostly incoherent noise, you screaming my name and then something about a man with two butt holes...
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
Randomize
