I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
