i feel like the song jizz in my pants was made for him.
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
I was totally going to sleep with him, until he got naked and started swinging around his boner singing "I'm so hard. oh yeah yeah yeah, I'm so hard" like Rihanna.
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Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
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