Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
Randomize
